


Who THEY think we are.

by PatPrecieux



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Dialogue Heavy, M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-12
Updated: 2017-01-12
Packaged: 2018-09-16 23:31:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9294476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PatPrecieux/pseuds/PatPrecieux
Summary: Sherlock and John scroll through comments on the blog.It becomes quite clear that their "fans" haven't a clue as to who the detective and the doctor really are.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [DaisyFairy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaisyFairy/gifts).



> For DaisyFairy- a light in the darkness.
> 
>  
> 
> Funny how people always seem to think THEY know you better than you know yourself.

John brought the cups of tea into the sitting room where Sherlock was burrowed into the sofa cushions staring at a laptop.

 

"Still have to use mine mate?"

 

"In order to read the blog comments John."

 

The blonde smirked,"You mean the blog that went from 'riveting' to 'going down hill' when the good nurse discovered that I write it and not you?"

 

"The very same."

 

After five minutes of silence, John sat down next to Sherlock, not quite touching. "Anything interesting then?"

 

The furrow between Sherlock's eyebrows deepened. "More disturbing than interesting. Evidently our 'friends' in the media have published numerous lurid details concerning our last few weeks."

 

"Culverton Smith and his insanity? Surely no one's cheering for the serial killer?"

 

"No not at all, but people are talking."

 

"They do little else", John replied bumping the younger man's shoulder with his own.

 

"So I've heard. What's upsetting is the comments on the blog about me."

 

At this, the ex-soldier sat up straight placing a warm hand on his friend's neck. "Don't pay attention to critics."

 

"I could ignore criticism John, it's the ridiculous hero worship I can't abide. For God's sake, look at some of these entries. How surprised Mummy will be to discover that I am, in fact, the result of a virgin birth, and was found wrapped in my Belstaff lying in a manger."

 

"Don't imagine I am the subject of the same adulation", John said grimly, "not that I should be."

 

Sherlock turned to look intently at his blogger. "THAT is my bigger complaint. Why should you be reviled and demonized?"

 

John sighed, "Sherlock, I haven't been the most honorable of men of late."

 

"Bollocks to that! Christ, we've BOTH spent years treating each other like shite. WHERE have these people been for all that? The first day we lived together, I abandoned you in a strange part of town knowing you would be set upon by Mycroft. Then later, I forced you to commit murder."

 

"Your brother would have kidnapped me at some point, and you didn't force me to shoot."

 

"Do be honest John, of course I did. You were right, I WAS going to take that damn pill."

 

The doctor shook his head, "I know, but you 'cured' my limp."

 

"I poisoned your tea, nearly got you shot in a museum, ruined your dates, AND got you strapped to a bomb, at which point YOU tried to save ME. Add to that, if only briefly, I thought you might be Moriarty."

 

"I stormed off in a rage all the time, ignored your efforts to be a better friend, AND you fought for me just as hard. You almost got blown to bits in this flat and where was I? Off having a strop. Course you thought I was that prick, HE planned it that way."

 

At this point John went for more tea. Sherlock continued to read.

 

"John this is intolerable. I am not your victim, if anything YOU are MY victim."

 

The older man put the tea down and sat, this time leaving no distance between them.

 

"Oi! None of that Sherlock. Let's agree that neither of us is a victim, and certainly not of each other."

 

"I gassed you and 'amused' myself watching you cowering terrified in a cage like an animal, feeding your delusions instead of refuting them."

 

"You tried to show me how terrified YOU were the night before and I dismissed you like you were a whiny child."

 

"With good reason. I was never honest with you about human emotion. I always lied. Why believe me?"

 

"Because friends believe each other. Or should at least try to."

 

"You do yourself a disservice John. The first time you hit me, I asked you to. The only time you EVER lied to me was to spare my feelings over the 'death' of 'The Woman' when I already knew her true fate. And finally, after recklessly playing the most dangerous game of my life, I jumped, making sure you saw every second, leaving you kneeling in my 'blood', more broken than I was."

 

"We don't need to go over this."

 

"Yes, we do. Here is someone commenting you have no right to keep bringing it up because I suffered as well. I did, but I was rescued from my physical suffering. The scars remain, but the pain is gone. You can never be rescued from your mental pain."

 

"That's true, but you came back and I hit you."

 

"I treated the entire thing as a joke. You cried at my grave for years and I drew a mustache on my upper lip and pretended to be a waiter."

 

"I can't deny I was upset. But your back, Sherlock."

 

"You had no way of knowing, and still I didn't learn. When, once again, you trusted me and we were trapped with the bomb in the tube carriage, I let you think we were doomed. Then I took advantage of your compassion to ask for your forgiveness. When I received it, I laughed at you making light of your courage in what you thought were our last seconds."

 

"You HAD pulled me out of that bonfire."

 

"I prefer my doctors clean shaven, not roasted. In any case, you were only in both those situations because of me.

 

"As I recall, I punished you by making you my Best Man. Silly me, I just figured making that speech would embarrass you for life. Then you turn around and be brilliant, plus you save the life of my former commanding officer."

 

"But I spoiled the evening by revealing the pregnancy, and I left the wedding early."

 

"The baby would have made herself known soon enough, and I watched you all day never appreciating how much it cost you to be at my wedding. To stand at my side as I chose her."

 

"You loved her. You chose her because I left you."

 

"She shot you."

 

"She loved you. She could have killed me."

 

"I will never be sure she didn't fail in her true intent. Still I took her back."

 

"You took me back."

 

"And you murdered CAM to protect the woman who shot you."

 

"Then I left you again, and I embraced the drugs."

 

"Not my happiest moment, knowing you were willingly going on a suicide mission. But you were only gone four minutes. And we discovered Sherlock is not a girl's name."

 

"I was abandoning you then, but you didn't abandon me."

 

"Until I did Sherlock. Anyone but you, I said, anyone but you."

 

"I should never have agitated that horrible old woman. Showing off, I killed your wife."

 

"You were only being Sherlock Holmes. The deductions, the solutions, ARE you. That woman and her gun killed Mary, not you."

 

"When charged with saving you, my 'magnificent brain' went directly to drugs. Effective perhaps, but hardly advisable. I keep finding new ways to hurt you. People seem willing to ignore that. I am NOT the innocent party here."

 

"You're my best friend, and I beat you. Not hit you, beat you."

 

"So the blog comments keep reminding everyone. Read these John. 'He should never be forgiven.' 'No excuse for this behavior.' And my favorite, 'Sherlock should be with Lestrade.' These are worse than crap telly."

 

Sherlock got up and began pacing. "You and I always forgive each other. Should we? That's no one else's damn business. We just do."

 

"Yeah we do. Think 'they' would know that. You and Greg would be handsome together however."

 

"That's not the least bit humorous John. Considering how long I've known him, I think that good ship has sailed. And as far as you having no excuse.."

 

"There IS no excuse Sherlock. I'm a fucking doctor!"

 

"Which makes you perfect? What in your past history would lead 'them' to believe you incapable of violence? You are a traumatized war veteran with PTSD, overcome with grief at the murder of your wife, left to care for a newly born child, and dealing with the drugged induced hallucinations of the man, who despite everything, you rushed in to save from a maniacal killer. How easy would it have been to simply let Culverton Smith remove from your life the curse that is me?" 

 

"Don't say that Sherlock, not ever. To lose you is unthinkable, promise me you will never NOT value yourself."

 

"I promise John. I do, however, need YOUR permission then to NOT be perfect." 

 

"You are under the impression I consider you perfect?"

 

A small smile pulled at one corner of his mouth. "Don't you?"

 

"Deduce it you berk. But permission granted."

 

"In that case, I'm going to answer some of these comments."

 

John reached over and gently closed the laptop. "I think a better idea would be to disable comments until you and I have time to figure things out."

 

"I don't like these people raging over things they know nothing about."

 

"Poking them isn't going to help matters, although I agree with you."

 

"Then what should we do?"

 

"YOU are going to work on getting more healthy, and I'm going to sit with a therapist until my head is back on my shoulders. WE are going to forgive each other, and take care of each other."

 

"And Rosie. I want to help with Rosie."

 

"You will. You can teach her to play Cluedo. Spare me the aggro."

 

"And all these people who are judging us? What about them?"

 

The doctor put his arms around his friend and sighed. "We just have to let them judge, can't stop them. But if 'the Game is on' we have the winning advantage, because of one thing we know that 'they' don't."

 

"What one thing do we know, John?"

 

"WE know that you and I are going to be fine because, WE AREN'T who THEY think we are."

 

**Author's Note:**

> Perfection is life's greatest fallacy. All idols have feet of clay. To ignore that in favor of a fantasy world is to invite great disappointment.
> 
>  
> 
> ** This is how I imagine a living, feeling, healing Sherlock and John would finally talk things out.


End file.
